The Things I Wish I'd Known About Breast Feeding
Before I begin…I must first promise that I know plenty of truly wonderful devoted mothers who, for whatever reason, were not able to breast feed their babies.
They are no less amazing than those of us who made it through the hardest times and (hopefully) got to enjoy what can only be described as the pure magic that followed.
I’m compelled to write this post because my breast feeding journey began as one of the hardest things I’ve done, but is now one of my proudest achievements and some of the most precious memories I hold of Ollie and I in our first year together. It’s something I’m absolutely determined to do again with our next little blessing due in a matter of weeks.
I really hope that what I’m about to share could perhaps make the journey a little easier for another mum, or encourage someone to keep going when they’re about to quit. These are things I wish I’d known back then, little pearls of wisdom that I’ll take with me on my next wonderful, challenging, exhausting and downright magical journey into breast feeding.
They’re learning too
I’d seen it on TV, read about it in my birthing books. I was told that he would feed within 30 minutes of being born. That they would lay him in my chest and he would route around for his first feed and find it himself. Well, this wasn’t the case at all. Ollie seemed just as confused by feeding as me! After a couple of hours without a successful feed the midwife had to manually express the tiniest bit of milk to encourage him to feed. I was in such a panic, worried why he wouldn’t latch on like I’d been promised. If this happens to you, just relax, he’ll find it eventually and your calmness will only make it that little bit easier to find.
Lock the door
Haven’t washed your hair? No make-up? The house is a tip? Some days it can all feel a little out of control and the last thing you may feel like is entertaining the neighbour you never speak to while mopping up the endless puddles of baby sick. It’s TOTALLY OK to lock the door if that’s what you need.
Keep temptation away
There’s no denying it, those early days and weeks are HARD. Sometimes REALLY HARD. It’s so tempting to reach for the formula when l your nipples are sore and chapped, your breasts are engorged and you haven’t slept for more than an hour in 3 days. Sorry I’m making it sounds so awful, it can sure feel that way at the time.
One of the best pieces of advice that I was given prior to Ollie’s arrival was not to have any formula milk in the house. Instead, keep things that will help you get through the day/night without giving up. Cooling or warming gel pads, nipple cream, comfy bras. Just know that it WILL pass and it WILL be worth it.
Smile and move on…
A little hypocritical as I write this post, which is based on my own advice (lol)… but the truth is… advice is just a form of nostalgia. Most people are trying to help you in a situation they remember was a challenge but judgement based on their own experiences can feel like a huge amount of pressure. Ollie fed so frequently for weeks, I was often met with comments like “not again?”. It bothered me. I worried he wasn’t getting enough milk, perhaps I should try to get him into a routine…but it was all absolutely fine. It was just what he needed and as his mum, I should’ve trusted my instincts and not let ‘helpful advice’ get me down.
Sometimes all they want is comfort
Make sure you have dummies for the times he’s using you for comfort. Not all babies feel the need to suckle for comfort, so we didn’t have these in the house the first time around, and Colin had to go out late at night as a last resort to purchase some. I love the clear Philips Avent ones and still use these at nap time now. As well as being Orthodontic and BPA-Free they’re totally transparent so won’t spoil your view of your sweet babes face. Dummies not only soothe and provide comfort, they’re also recommended by the NHS to reduce the risk of SIDS.
Cry Baby
So nobody told me about this, and I wasn’t prepared!! No matter where you are or what you’re doing, that tiny cry may trigger something in your body that sends your milk supply into overdrive. Save yourself the embarrassment of huge round circles over each breast, or waking up in a sticky mess. The Philips Avent Day and Night Breast Pads are simply wonderful. So soft and smooth through clothing, yet super absorbent. I’ve got plenty of these ready for this time.
Strong Willed Babies
I’d followed the midwife’s orders completely, and avoided any kind of bottle feeding for the first few weeks until we’d ‘established breast feeding’. So when the time came for me to express some milk for the first time, I was shocked to find that Ollie REFUSED to take it from a bottle. He’d gotten so used to the breast that he just wouldn’t take milk from anywhere else. I have to admit, I found this hugely stressful, as my return to work was imminent. I spend a fortune on ridiculous gimmicky bottles, some in the shape of boobs, some promising a money-back guarantee if the baby wouldn’t take it…but nothing was working. Eventually we decided to change the teat on our Philips Avent bottles to a faster flow, and this worked perfectly! Thank goodness! This time around I’m going to be expressing from day one, and Colin is really looking forward to being able to feed the new baby too.
Make life easy for yourself.
Anything you can do to make your breast feeding journey easier, it’s so worth it! Some of the essentials I would absolutely recommend are:
Electric Breast Pump – this time I’ve gone for a double as time will be extra precious with a 19 month old to care for as well as a newborn.
A Manual Breast Pump for travel, days at work etc… your breasts can become
very uncomfortable if you don’t nurse for a few hours.
Breast Milk storage – absolutely essential for keeping that precious expressed milk in the best condition.
Several bottles and a variety or treats for various ages and the needs of our baby
Steam Steriliser – last time we had the Philips Avent Microwave Steriliser, which worked well, particularly for travel. But this time I wanted something slim and convenient that doesn’t take up too much space in the kitchen.
Routine goes out the window
Unlike formula feed babies, in most cases, the routine goes out the window with babes that are breast fed. Ollie seemed to want milk at different times, for different times every day, some days feeding for over an hour, every hour, and others just for 20 mins on and off all day. Don’t stress out, or try to force a routine. You’ll soon find your rhythm, just relax and go with the flow as much as you possibly can.
Don’t be too proud
I can’t stress this one enough. Whether it’s your partner, your family, your friends or even in online chat or social media, don’t be afraid to let others know when it’s tough. It doesn’t mean you’re failing, or moaning, or giving up, it means you’re honest. Let it out and move forward. People are kind, and want to help, let them. No chores are as important as soaking up your precious baby in those early days.
You won’t want to stop
I SO hope I haven’t put you off. As difficult as it may sound, it’s all SO SO worth it. Nothing compares to holding your baby close, that incredible bond that’s built through breast feeding that will never go away.
Ollie decided he was ready to stop nursing when he was nine months old. He would pull away and seemed frustrated, so I knew it was time. But I have to admit, I found it hard. It really was the most incredible journey and I wasn’t sure I was ready to move on. I’m sure not everyone feels this way, but I know many of my friends experienced it too. All I can say is that I’m incredibly proud and thankful for our journey, and I truly can’t wait to experience the same again with our next baby.
Ultimately, my number one golden nugget of advice for any new mum….TRUST YOURSELF! Every baby, every situation, every mother is different. You will compare, worry, doubt yourself, but follow your heart. You were born to do this, and ONLY YOU know what’s best for you and your baby.
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This blog post was kindly sponsored by Philips Avent, who I was delighted to work with after using their products with Oliver from day one 🙂 All opinions, words and images are my own.